Right, let me tell you about Luisa Zissman. You know, the one who almost won The Apprentice and then more or less colonised half the British media. I have been watching her since she tottered into Lord Sugar’s boardroom in 2013, and, blimey, what a journey it has been. I remember watching that show and thinking she was either bonkers or a genius. Looks like it was all a little bit of both, wasn’t it?

That Apprentice Moment

Luisa Zissman The Apprentice days were mental TV. She rolled up with three businesses already in place. THREE. Most of us can barely manage their weekly shopping and then there’s Luisa with her cupcakes, eBay electronics and God knows what else. She called her cupcake shop Dixie’s Cupcakery, after her young daughter. A bit soppy, that, but it did the trick.

The woman said that her businesses were valued at £1.5 million. The newspapers had a field day interrogating those numbers, but you know what? She was actually making money while the rest of us were still learning how to use Excel. Honest to God, I thought she was going to win that series. Even Lord Sugar looked dead impressed with her. But nope, runner-up again. Story of her life, that.

The Big Brother Stint

Off she went to Celebrity Big Brother. Classic Luisa move, really. Most people would run and hide after The Apprentice, but not our girl. Straight into the house of another reality show. Came fourth there as well. Beginning to wonder if fourth place is her lucky number or something. But with Luisa, and this is the thing with Luisa, with her, there are no failures. Every show, every appearance, it’s all building something bigger.

Podcast Queen

Fast forward to today and she’s killing the game with this whole podcasting thing. LuAnna with Anna Williamson gets over a million downloads monthly. A MILLION. That’s more than some real radio shows receive. I have listened to a number of episodes when I’m sitting in traffic. It’s actually brilliant. They talk about everything, such as relationships, parenting, business, and which celebrities are sleeping together.

Good, unabashed girl talk, the kind you don’t want to switch off. They even went on tour. Sold out at the London Palladium; can you believe that? Reality TV and the Palladium. Only in Britain, eh?

Business Brain

What I love about Luisa is she never stays still. Most people would have panicked when the cupcake fad faded (and let’s be real here, it was always heading there), but not her. She just shifted gears. Now she’s into horse breeding. HORSES. Like, who makes the leap from cupcakes to horses? She must open her eyes each morning thinking, “All right, what sort of mental business idea shall I attempt today?”

The woman also has 701K Instagram followers. That’s proper influencer territory. Most of those Apprentice people were lucky if they got to keep 20K after a couple of years.

Television Natural

I’ve seen her on Good Morning Britain millions of times. She’s brilliant at it, actually. Never at a loss for words, always has something to say about something. Some think she’s a bit much, and that’s exactly why they keep booking her. She also did tonnes of presenting work. Big Brother’s Bit on the Side and various chat shows. Actually very good at live television, which is harder than it looks. I’ve done a little bit of radio, and going live is scary. She makes it look easy.

Family Life

A few years back, she married Andrew Collins. Seems like a decent bloke. She already has Dixie from her first marriage to Oliver Zissman. Managing to keep the family stuff largely private even while being so publicly candid about everything else requires a certain agility. It’s not easy being a working mum when you do a job that means you have to go on TV and argue with people on Twitter. But she looks like she can handle it.

The Reinvention Thing

This is how Luisa is smartly clever. It takes most reality TV people one moment and they’re done. She just finds another way to stay relevant. Cupcakes, television, podcasting, horses, speaking engagements. It’s like she collects jobs. She also does business consulting now, which makes sense. And if you were a runner-up on The Apprentice and made a success of your businesses, people are interested in how you pulled it off. Smart move, really.

Current Day Luisa

The podcast’s still going strong. They also do extra shows now; something called Totally Extra on Thursdays. Taking over the podcasting world, they are. She’s making appearances at business events to speak. Always Instagramming about some new project or collaboration. The woman never sits still.

My Honest Take

Look, I know some people think she’s too loud or whatever. But honestly? Good on her. In a world where everyone’s terrified of having an opinion, she just says what she thinks. I’ve watched loads of Apprentice candidates over the years. Most of them disappear after six months. Luisa’s still here eleven years later, still making noise, still building businesses. That takes something special.

Luisa Zissman The Apprentice appearance was just the beginning. She turned that into a proper career, not just a moment of fame. That’s actually quite impressive when you think about it. She’s 37 now and shows no signs of slowing down. Whatever bonkers business idea she comes up with next, I’ll probably end up following it. She makes everything more interesting just by being involved. The woman’s built an empire out of being herself. Can’t argue with that, can you?